As an entrepreneur, every day is an opportunity to focus on building my business, networking with like-minded individuals, and developing new opportunities. I wake up with one mission: to focus on what truly matters—creating solutions, scaling my business, and finding the right talent to help me grow.
However, it never ceases to amaze me how many people invest their time in something that doesn’t serve their own progress: pocket watching. For those unfamiliar, pocket watching is when people focus all their energy on observing and critiquing the actions, successes, or failures of others. It’s the constant chatter about what other people are doing, how they’re succeeding (or failing), and pointing fingers at their accomplishments.
Now, I get it. As an entrepreneur, I’m aware that people often take shots or criticize what they don’t understand. But here’s the thing: nobody truly knows what goes on behind closed doors in someone else's business. The struggles, the sleepless nights, the risk-taking, and the hard decisions—people rarely see that part of the journey. Instead, they opt to criticize the visible achievements without understanding the effort behind them.
This behavior—pocket watching—reminds me of a powerful lesson shared in The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen R. Covey. Covey explains that people who constantly criticize others, often without a true understanding of their journey, miss out on creating value themselves. They focus all their energy on others’ actions instead of developing themselves. In the long run, this leads to stagnation and frustration because criticism, when it’s not constructive, doesn’t create any real value. It’s a cycle that prevents growth and keeps people from making meaningful progress in their own lives.
The Destructive Cycle of Criticism
Covey argues that individuals who criticize others often lack a solid sense of purpose or direction in their own lives. They’re not focused on creating or contributing—they’re more concerned with tearing down the success of others. This behavior doesn’t stem from a place of wisdom or meaningful insight but rather from insecurity, jealousy, or the need to feel superior. When people find themselves constantly critiquing others, it can serve as a temporary distraction from their own lack of progress. However, without dedicating time to improving themselves, they miss the opportunity to grow and eventually find themselves stagnating while the people they criticized continue to advance.
Here’s why Covey suggests that criticism without substance ultimately leads to failure:
Lack of Internal Growth:
Individuals who criticize others are often not investing the time and energy into developing themselves. Instead of seeking out ways to improve their own skills, knowledge, and capabilities, they become fixated on other people’s perceived flaws or shortcomings. This external focus is a way to deflect attention from their own lack of accomplishment. However, without dedicating time to improving themselves, they miss the opportunity to grow and eventually find themselves stagnating while the people they criticized continue to advance.Absence of Positive Contribution:
Criticizing others doesn’t create any value. It doesn’t solve problems, generate ideas, or foster collaboration. Instead, it creates a negative, toxic environment where progress is stifled. Those who focus on tearing others down rarely contribute anything of value to the world around them. In contrast, those who focus on creating solutions, innovating, and helping others succeed are the ones who ultimately build meaningful legacies.Loss of Trust and Respect:
Covey highlights that criticism, especially when it’s baseless or mean-spirited, erodes relationships. People who engage in constant criticism lose the trust and respect of those around them. Over time, they become isolated and disconnected from the very communities or networks that could help them grow. In contrast, individuals who focus on building trust through positive actions, collaboration, and integrity are the ones who cultivate strong, supportive relationships that fuel their success.A Cycle of Negativity:
When people consistently focus on the flaws and mistakes of others, they cultivate a negative mindset. They begin to see the world through a lens of scarcity rather than abundance. This mindset can quickly lead to burnout and frustration. Without an optimistic, growth-oriented outlook, it becomes nearly impossible to create success or achieve long-term goals. As Covey suggests, this negativity is self-perpetuating—those who criticize are likely to attract more negativity into their lives.Missed Opportunities for Learning:
Criticism, when rooted in envy or malice, creates a barrier to learning. Instead of seeking lessons from the achievements or failures of others, critics become emotionally invested in the idea of being “right” or in proving others wrong. This prevents them from gaining insights that could help them improve. In contrast, those who adopt a mindset of continual learning view others’ successes and setbacks as opportunities for growth and reflection.
The Power of Focus and Personal Integrity
Covey urges us to focus on developing our own skills and talents rather than dwelling on the flaws of others. When we shift our focus inward, we place value on our own growth and create a foundation of integrity that can weather any external challenge. This focus on personal development, on building something of value rather than tearing others down, allows us to create lasting success.
In essence, Covey’s message is that true influence and success are grounded in character, not criticism. Criticizing others distracts us from our own path and invites unnecessary negativity into our lives. By focusing on creating and contributing to the world around us, we align ourselves with the habits of highly effective people, ultimately leading to a more fulfilling and impactful life.
In summary, Covey teaches that success comes from building, not destroying. Those who focus on improving themselves, learning from others, and contributing positively to their communities are the ones who create lasting value. Criticism, especially when it's unfounded or habitual, is a sure sign of stagnation and will ultimately cause those who indulge in it to fall behind, while those who focus on building and growing continue to thrive.
So, how do you avoid falling into the trap of pocket watching? Start by staying focused on your own journey. Don’t let others divert your attention from the goals you’ve set for yourself. Focus on improving your leadership skills, refining your communication, and developing the talents of your team. If you spend your time around people who are trying to improve themselves, who are striving to build and create, that’s where you’ll grow the most.
The bottom line is this: If you're not in the entertainment business, creating gossip or drama, there’s no value in spending your time watching other people’s pockets. Instead, focus on becoming the best version of yourself, celebrate success in advance, and stay committed to your vision.
So, let others watch you rise, while you focus on building your own empire. Stay focused on your focus, and remember: People always find their level. Make sure you’re surrounded by those who inspire and challenge you to become better, not those who hold you back with distractions.
Goodbye for now, and keep building.
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